Relationships in the Classroom
By Frank Bellomo, Elementary Principal
As you think back to your favorite teacher, what thoughts come to mind? What are some of your fondest memories of this extraordinary educator who seemed to have left a lasting impression on you?
I feel pretty confident in saying that most educators at one time or another had a teacher that made a difference for them. It's amazing that school personnel can have such powerful impacts on people. All staff in a school district, no matter their role, can play a significant part in the day of students, but for the purpose of my writing today, I will focus on teachers. No other profession allows someone to have an impact on so many people. Not all teachers have the same impact though. Some teachers have found the answer in one of the most powerful strategies that exists. A strategy that can be utilized by a new teacher or a veteran. A strategy that is in fact free of charge although it does require a little extra time. Have you guessed the strategy yet? It's RELATIONSHIPS.
As a teacher, or anyone working in education for that matter, nothing will be more important than your ability to build relationships. You can be an expert in your subject area, have the best college education, multiple degrees, countless professional development hours logged, extensive lesson plans, and a list of other add ons but nothing will match your ability to first build a relationship. Remember when I began by having you think of our favorite teacher? Well, most of us who played along would probably agree it was the teacher's ability to build a relationship with us that made a difference. When you like someone, you are more apt to want to learn something from them or work harder for them because you don't want to let them down. It makes all the difference when we feel someone cares about us.
In your classrooms and in your schools, take the extra time to learn about your students. Begin the year getting to know them rather than by jumping full steam into curriculum. Time spent early on in relationship building will save you instruction time in the long run. It's no secret that teachers who take the time to build relationships and learn about their students have fewer behavior problems with their "problematic" students. Now, this isn't to say that things will go perfect but it's safe to say as I mentioned before, we all work a little bit harder to make sure we don't let down the people we like or those we feel care about us.
Several Ways to Build Relationships With Your Students:
Begin the day by greeting them with a smile.
As a teacher, you have the opportunity to brighten someone's day. Imagine the impact you can have when you begin each day like this. A high five, a smile, or a simple, "Hey, kid, what's up?", will go a long way.
Listen to your students. Listen to their ideas and their concerns. Some of their ideas and concerns will be vocalized but many times they will be silent. When you know your students, you will know to LOOK for signs in their expressions or emotions and this will allow you to give them extra time if you think something might be bothering them.
Allow them to share their interests and hobbies. Once your students realize you care about them outside of school, it opens the door for them to really listen to you because they know it's not just about the work placed in front of them. Express an interest in them. Ask about their cultures and try to find out something special about them that they are willing to share. I remember my son coming home from school one day this year in 7th grade gleaming about how his teacher was talking to him about playing baseball. This simple interaction made a connection with him that will last the rest of the year.
Connect with your students. Just as your students share with you, be sure to share your interests as well. Make yourself seem relatable as a person. Connecting with your students allows them to see the parallels between the both of you.
Show empathy and a genuine interest in their well being and growth as a student both academically and socially. Remember, your students may have various challenges and stressors affecting them at home that can have huge impacts on their readiness to learn at school.
Laugh with your students. Laughter is often the best medicine. Whether you are the one providing the laughs or your various students, laughter can do wonders! We all can make a little extra time for laughter in the classroom. Your kids will appreciate it!
Choose your battles with your students. This is especially true when you know students are struggling in various areas such as behavior, lack of organization, or other things that other kids don't have trouble with. You can have high expectations and challenge your students while also taking the time to build relationships.
The list of ways to build relationships with your students is endless. No matter what you do, it should always come from the heart.
"There are many strategies that will capture our students' attention for the the lesson or class period, but the relationships we build with them can capture their attention for a lifetime." F. Bellomo
"Each day you have the opportunity to connect with students, inspire your students, laugh with them, and empower them. As educators, we truly have the greatest gift. You have "super powers" and they all begin with relationships!" F. Bellomo
Follow Frank Bellomo on Twitter @FbellomoB